A few days ago, I ventured into Hobby Lobby with my two little ones. I ran into a friend, and we attempted to talk for a few minutes. My children could not stand being still and waiting. They were bobbing, weaving, and playing with one another, intent on doing what they wanted, in the moment, even though I had laid out different expectations for them. I was terrified that they would inadvertently break something or cause harm to themselves.
I excused myself from the conversation and gave a gentle nudge for them to rethink their current plan of action. They got it together, but my frustration lasted longer than it should have. I kept thinking how hard it is to be a parent. We “lay down the law” out of love, trying to help these little people become the best versions of themselves, and they fight it tooth and nail at times. I find myself thinking “I’m giving you all the guidance you need. Why won’t you just listen?”
The days have passed quickly, and I have had a lot on my mind. I haven’t thought much about the Hobby Lobby adventure. As I prayed this morning, in my quiet space, my prayer started out something like this…
I know You have given me everything I need to become the best version of myself, through knowledge of You. I don’t know why it is so hard to stay disciplined at times. I don’t know why I sometimes do the exact opposite of what I feel you nudging me to do…
And I froze. It hit me right in the gut that I am also the kid in the store. I do what I want, in the moment, rather than doing what I “should” do. I run away. I rebel. I throw internal temper tantrums. I know what would be best for me, still I choose to do what’s “fun” or “easy”. I, too, need to learn to be still and wait. I, too, need to listen to the guidance that has been given to me. I, too, need to listen to my parent–God, the Father. I need to heed his nudges.
I am continually amazed at how God uses situations to teach lessons. One off day of shopping has served as a great reminder of the importance of discipline.